Lessons from the Pole

7 Secrets I Learned Pole Dancing in My 40s that I Wish I Knew in My 20s

June 30, 2013
7 Secrets I Learned Pole Dancing in My 40s that I Wish I Knew in My 20s

June’s Pole Dance Blog Hop theme is “things i wish i had known before i started pole dancing” Pole and sensual dance gifted me with body bliss. It taught me how to drop in to my body. And listen to her speak. Life keeps getting better because of pole dancing. Here are 7 secrets I learned pole dancing in my forties that I wish I knew in my twenties. 1. Feelings are our Friends Before pole dancing I learned the importance of feeling emotions in my body. If I hadn’t, I never would’ve had the courage (or skills) to feel the fear—that I’d be the least flexible and fattest in the class—and go anyway. Still, I resisted ‘negative’ feelings. Pole dancing taught me to welcome them all. To appreciate the beauty in tears (of joy, awe, sadness), vulnerability and messy imperfection (my most recent Aha). Dive deep into emotions. Swim and swirl in them. Revel in them. Be with them. Express them through dance, music, drawing, painting, etc. There are gifts waiting to be discovered on the other side. Besides, when the universe wants you to learn a lesson, she’ll just keep triggering you until you get it anyway. When

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Unleash the Sexy Siren Within

April 10, 2013
Unleash the Sexy Siren Within

. Have you met your inner siren? What Clarissa Pinkola Estés calls the Wild Woman. The one who knows. When women reassert their relationship with the wildish nature, they are gifted with a permanent and internal watcher, a knower, a visionary, an oracle, an inspiratrice, an intuitive, a maker, a creator, an inventor, and a listener who guide, suggest and urge a vibrant life in the inner and outer worlds. When women are with the Wild Woman, the fact of that relationship glows through them. ~ Clarissa Pinkola Estés What Sheila Kelley refers to as the Erotic Creature. Her definition and other quotes appear in my post:  Honoring the wild nature of women. Your inner siren is your sexy side. The primal part of you that’s hidden away like Pandora’s box. For safekeeping. Safety. And, because it’s presumed evil. As women we’re shamed and blamed because our basic nature is sexy. We turn men on without even trying. That’s scary. . But it doesn’t have to be. . The more we relax into our bodies. Move in ways that feel luxurious. Adorn ourselves how we like it. The more erotic we become to the male gaze. And the more we

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What’s in My Beach and Pole Dance Bags

March 13, 2013
What’s in My Beach and Pole Dance Bags

For the last two months my favorite friday nights have included dancing on Ocean Beach at sunset followed by freedom pole (aka open pole, flight club, etc.) at Steel Heart Dance. The poles there are 20 feet high and often ice cold. Recently, while searching for reviews on Mighty Grip Ankle Protectors for these Mt Everest poles, I stumbled into a blog hop and facebook group of pole dance bloggers. I joined and committed to particpate in the March Pole Dance Blog Hop on products and companies. In addition to what’s pictured, there’s a notebook, a regular pen, ipod, headphones, iPhone 4—chosen for it’s camera (With Smugmug’s Camera Awesome app it provides most photos for the blog), lara bars and other routine items. Most what’s in my bags is devoted to fun. If this is your first time here, you may not know that playfulness is my essence when I dance. Play is my path to bliss. In the studio I play in, on and with poles, wall, floor, chairs, daybeds, stools, platform bases (super fun toy), curtains and even shadows on walls. On the beach—the sand, wind and waves provide wonderful energy to feel and explore. And with playmates—their movement,

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Reclaiming a lost piece of my soul with dance on Baker Beach

March 5, 2013
Reclaiming a lost piece of my soul with dance on Baker Beach

After receiving an extra long hug from Brian, my husband, when he arrived home from work on that Thursday, “It’s worse than I imagined. I cried all afternoon. It hurts deep inside from here to there,” I said pointing to the base of my sternum and belly button. “I almost can’t breathe. I left a piece of my soul in that room.” He hugged me again, commiserating, “Now you know what I feel like when I have to take down the Christmas decorations.” As we separated I half smiled and chuckled. “It’s not funny.” He smirked at me then stepped into the next room to look through the mail on our dining room table. Full body laughter erupted in me. “It is funny that you don’t think it’s funny.” He mock glared at me. “Is it okay if I go get changed.” He walked through the kitchen to our bedroom at the back of the house. As I reheated leftovers for dinner I said a silent prayer of thanks for his teasing and ability to make me laugh even on my saddest days. It lightened my mood, easing some of the pain flooding me after having our last class in

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Mothers, Wanna-be Mothers & Childless Women all Deserve to Feel Sexy!

December 12, 2012

Strong & Surprising Reaction to Video As I watched, tears pooled behind my eyes. I recognized Ali (and baby Jack) immediately from our shared S Factor history at retreats and immersion workshops. The exhaustion and stress of the playground melted away as Some Nights by Fun filled my ears. As Ali’s joy filled my screen and Jack’s curious gaze erupted into a gleeful giggle a huge grin spread across my face. As they began to play together on the pole, for a moment, I wanted to join in the fun. Then I realized even if I could pop into the video, I wouldn’t interrupt this playful and tender moment of joy and love between mother and son. Afterwards, I smiled at my memory of Ali’s dances while pregnant at a retreat in Monterey. The first in a flowy short white dress, her movement gentler than I’d witnessed before. I hadn’t even known she was pregnant until seeing her baby bump as she surrendered to the floor. And then later in the weekend, the mother and pregnant daughter mirror dance that left not a dry eye in the room from the precious display of shared love. I brushed away the single

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